LOVE YOURSELF - Take out the R...

Updated: Mar 4

How to Love Yourself: Let me get straight to the point...

If you are reading this, you already love yourself.

How do I know?

Because you are alive!

If you are alive, this means you love yourself enough to care for our most basic needs, which keeps your heart beating.

So why is "LOVE YOURSELF" posts everywhere?

Why so many inspirational quotes?

Why this BLOG series about LOVE YOURSELF?

If I already love myself, why is LOVE YOURSELF pushed down my throat everywhere, everyday?

I think there are two ways to look at what it means to LOVE YOURSELF.

One is from the perspective of meeting your most basic needs. It's about SURVIVORSHIP.

Another is more from an emotional, mental, spiritual perspective. It's about RELATIONSHIP.

The past 4 blogs, we address women's heart health awareness month, the idea Your Body is a Temple, the belief we can Feel Good Now, and how you should Dress to Impress YOU. I think it's safe to say we all know at least one person who does ALL the wrong things and lives a long life. They survive all their choices. Do you know what I'm talking about? And because we all know that person, we can easily roll our eyes when we are told:

"You should eat better!"

"Stop smoking."

"You need to exercise more.",

and on and on.

"If they survived, so can I!", we tell ourselves.

I could comment on that statement a thousand different ways, but I will just stick to two.

ONE, I believe we are all unique humans. We all have different DNA strands, with different intellectual and emotional intelligence, with different metabolisms, with different purposes. Comparison helps us forget those things.

And TWO, if I am a unique human being, I want to live a purpose-driven, joy-filled, healthy, and relational life, where time is simply a concept and not the whole story. To me, Ferly, it's not about living a long life. It's about living a life where I can offer the world the best version of my unique self, regardless of the amount of years I'm on this Earth. I would rather LIVE than OUTLIVE.

Take out the R and replace it with a comma:


L O V E Y O U , S E L F

I read this on Wikipedia and thought this was very thought provoking:

"Two types of self are commonly considered—the self that is the ego, also called the learned, superficial self of mind and body, an egoic creation, and the self which is sometimes called the 'True Self', the 'Observing Self', or the 'Witness'."

Our lifelong work is to be the self that is congruent with our purpose.

Who am I and what was I born to do?

If you don't believe in God, then who you are is a combination of information you have been told, learned and have accepted about yourself. For example, your parents were the first people to teach you about emotional relationship. Your family taught you about your worth in this world and how to get affirmation. Your first friend was one of the biggest influences on how to act outside your immediate family and how to create your own circle of relationships. The subconscious mind is developed within the first 0-4 years of your life, and then the conscious mind begins developing. The concept of right and wrong, good and bad, worthy and unworthy begin to enter our conscious mind and dictate our decision making process. You then begin to explore your purpose on Earth. Your identity begins to develop, and it is challenged once in a while during your lifetime. If you believe in God, all of the above is still true. The only difference is that your identity remains the same, regardless if you remember or occasionally forget it: you are God's child. Your purpose is to serve God through loving people, using your possessions, gifts and talents to love on people.

LOVE YOU, SELF is a kind reminder to be kind to yourself. How you are with yourself will eventually reflect out onto others.

You teach people how to treat you by how you treat yourself.

If you practice kindness with self, you will most likely practice kindness with others. LOVE YOU, SELF shows gratitude for the being you are, for what you have, the work you've done, the work you're about to do, and so much more.

I encourage you to make it a priority to work on your RELATIONSHIP with SELF.


If you have a big ego, this is music to your ears.

If you have low self-esteem, you are cringing right now.

Both of yall's perspective is misguided, friends.


For my big-headed, egotistic friends, I love you, but this is not about the universe revolving around you. This is about truth. Ego and True Self in agreement.

For my low self-esteem friends, I love you, but this is not about the universe revolving around you. It is not a vain exercise to think of ourselves more, but an invitation to think more of ourselves.

YOU were created. Period. YOU. I don't mean to offend anyone's belief system... but think about it... you think that's an accident? Whether your parents planned for you or not, YOU are here. YOU! Regardless of human planning or lack thereof, YOU are NOT an accident. YOU are purposeful.

When something has a purpose, does it serve itself? Does a multi-surface cleaner serve itself? Does a car serve itself? When something has a purpose, it always serves something (or someone) else.

For us humans, I think it begins with us learning that we are not an accident. We are here, and we are here for a purpose.

Take care of the SELF so SELF can serve and live out SELF's purpose.

(Read that a few times... I promise it makes sense!)





Take out the R...

replace it with comma...

add an exclamation mark at the end just because you can.


This concludes our LOVE YOURSELF series. I hope you have enjoyed reading each blog. My hope is that you at least took one valuable thing from this series and allow it to do its work in your life.

Rememeber, if you are in San Diego, I would be honored for you to join me at my event LOVE YOURSELF- DANCE YOUR HEART OUT. I put a lot of work into it to make sure you have a great time. I hope you can take advantage of it!

Happy Living!


  • Instagram
  • YouTube
  • Facebook
  • TikTok