Updated: Feb 21
How do I take control of my happiness?
Can I be happy right now?
I think those are questions we must ask ourselves daily.
My name is Ferly, and if you don't know me, I am a professional dancer and one of the co-founders of the dance fitness program, 3XT.
I have been dancing since I was 3 years old. Yes, that's very cute and very fun, but it definitely came with its set of baggage.
I have spent more time in front of a mirror than I would like to think about. From dance classes and rehearsals, to show hair and makeup prep time, dancers use the mirror to dissect everything about themselves:
"Improve your arms!"
"My hair is a mess."
"My legs look horrible!"
"I look tired!"
"My stomach looks fat."
"I look awkward."
I have learned to be REALLY HARD ON MYSELF. My career encourages me to search for what's wrong in the mirror, fix it, and then maybe I can be good enough.
I did not want to live my life like that- working towards perfection, and IF achieved, THEN I would be happy.
That sounded exhausting and not happy at all!
At 29 I had an epiphany. For the first time I asked myself "What are some things I can do today that help me feel good right now?" I thought if I consciously did the things that bring me life and joy, the "I feel good now" mentality would eventually outweigh the "you suck" one. It had to!
I just wanted to feel good and feel beautiful now!
I love working towards a goal. But why not feel good now as I'm on my way to feeling my best? Wouldn't doing happy and healthy things today affect my tomorrow?
As a 34 year old woman and dancer:
I enjoy massages that help me manage stress and muscle tightness.
I enjoy working with bodywork specialists who can help me address muscle imbalances and chronic injuries.
I enjoy a good yoga class where I am encouraged to focus on and appreciate breathing and the silencing of the mind.
I enjoy a fun dance class that reminds me there's freedom readily available to me.
I enjoy looking my best.
For my LOVE YOURSELF event (read more about it here), I am sharing some of my favorite professionals that help me live a happier life today. If you are not in San Diego, I hope you still find some value from the list of services listed. You might get inspired to look for a similar service near you. The point is try different things and see what brings a smile to that beautiful face. Imagine we did something that brought us immediate joy every single day? How different would your current life be? Ah, the possibilities!
Beauty Obsession by Iris Flores
Iris is my lash artist. I am a fan of eyelash extensions. I like the way they look on me and it decreases the time it takes for me to get ready in the morning. I enjoy doing the things that help me feel beautiful and put together.
Services Irirs provides:
Lash tint and lift
Ways to contact IrisL
I met the CEO, Chastitee, at a networking event for Entrepreneurial women. I immediately feel in love with her energy and desire to help women feel beautiful in their own skin.
Professional Make-up services
Skincare Fuel Guide
Body work by Simone Buonacorso
Simone does house calls here in San Diego. Her massage therapy is just delicious.
She is a yogi with a profound understanding of the body and her hands were made to change people's lives. You feel so good on and off her table.
You can contact her at email@example.com
Kyrié Koehn ~ Longevity Specialist
I first met Kyrié as a yoga instructor and I quickly labeled her as my favorite. Her thoroughness and high compassion with the practice of yoga made me fall in love with practicing. But I then come to find out there's even more to Kyrié. She has over a decade of bodywork experience. She uses her background in massage therapy, yoga medicine, personal training, and nutrition to customize private yoga sessions that are tailor fitted to each individual. Her mission is to help women heal, grow, and THRIVE!
You can contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org
San Diego Massage and Esthetics - Rachel Worley
Rachel is an artist. Once in a while I struggle with cystic acne so for me routine treatment is a must. And now the getting rid of acne scars is a priority for me. She does it all, people! You can see countless pictures of real results all across her website and social media platforms.
Services she offers:
Facials and Peels
DMK "Plasma Effect" Enzyme Treatment
Celluma LED Light Therapy
In Home Services- Hair Styling-Color and Spray Tanning
Contact San Diego Massage and Esthetics at https://www.rachelworleycmt.com/contact
Serenity Skin and Body Care
Denise Johnson has been a dedicated Esthetician for 30 years. She has worked and trained in many exclusive resort hotels and spas. She’s owned her own skin care salon ( Serenity Skin and Body Care) for 20 years in the quaint downtown village of Carlsbad. She offers a variety of services but her love is creating the perfect custom facial for her clients. One of her favorite things about this field is it is ever-changing and she is always excited to learn more. Denise is passionate about her work and it shows through her healing hands.
Denise gives the most delicious facials. She has the BEST products and generously uses them on you. She has helped tremendously with getting rid of my cystic acne. Get ready because her facials also involve scalp, face, neck, shoulders, arms, hands AND feet massages! I leave there so stress-free that traffic makes me giggle. Heaven on earth!
Other services she provides: Custom Facials, Peels, Microdermabrasion with Crystals/ Oxygen and or Diamond, LightStim Redlight Therapy, Head to Toe Waxing, Lash and Brow Tinting.
You may reach Denise at (760)805-2616.
The Beauty Secret by Porctia Symone
Porctia moved from Florida, where she had very very own and successful beauty salon. Now she is in California, where she's changing lives daily. I use her waxing services and she's extremely professional and makes the experience as pain-free as possible.
A beauty and wellness center specializing in the enhancement of facial beauty features like your brows, lips and lashes, the services she provides include:
Permanent Makeup- including microblading and shading
Hyaluronic (pain free) injections
Full body waxing
Full face Threading
Ways to contact her: Instagram @browsbyporctiasymone
Yeah... big duh! But creating and now teaching 3XT gives me so much joy it feels like it should be illegal! I feel so free, so motivated, so happy! Dance and Fitness are two things that bring me a lot of joy. Putting it together, the way we did with 3XT, is (humbly speaking) deliciously genius!
If you are not in San Diego, you can start working out and dancing with me TODAY through our free daily workouts.
If you are in San Diego, I hope you can join me for LOVE YOURSELF event. If you are unavailable February 22nd, then I hope you can join our weekly San Diego classes at BASE FITNESS CLUB and FIT ATHLETIC CLUB in Solana Beach and Little Italy! If you are in Los Angeles, check out our classes at Knockout LA.
Get in touch with us if you have any questions about that.
Am I suggesting that if you do these things you'll be a happy person? Maybe, maybe not. I don't know your life and what your current needs are. What I do know is that there a lot of lies we have been told and we have believed throughout our lifetime that makes us feel we are less than what we are. The journey of releasing those lies and adopting truths is a journey of daily healthy choices. Everyday we must do the work to get what we ultimately want: freedom and joy. Plant happy choices daily, reap a happier healthier future YOU. Happy today, happy tomorrow.
For your consideration...
To do that deep, heart-centered, mind-altering work to release the lies and adopt truth, I would advise you to speak to a mentor, or even see a therapist. Therapy is an investment I happily make on myself. I deserve to hear and understand what I tell myself out loud. When you don't open up to somebody, you are limited to your single perspective. Encourage yourself to explore and gain other perspectives. Maybe, just maybe, we don't know everything, and that's okay!
REMEMBER: the things that bring your joy now, do them daily and unapologetically.
Feel Good Now!
NEXT BLOG of this Love Yourself Series: DRESS TO IMPRESS YOU